I Am….the same
“I spent my whole life tryna improvise, I’m not saying that shit for you to sympathize. Spent my whole life tryna find the light thats at the end of the tunnel should have realized it was inside.”
I know I said I would use this blog as my “journal” but, it’s not something I’ve been able to do for a couple of reasons:
1. I needed to truly be able to gather myself and feel different energies this 1st week.
2. I needed to make sure certain practices were now going to be a part of my daily routine.
3. Real simple…I told ya’ll I battle with the spirit of procrastination (just gotta be real with this one).
Now that I have a some things rooted, I can open up to discuss a few things…
So, as I close out week 1, I feel….the same. Allow me to explain. I picked up practicing Yoga this week. While I’ve been “eating clean” (no meat, no fish, no dairy, no alcohol, no sugar), working out daily, and meditating more, yoga has been the experence that’s stood out this week to me. It has been one of the hardest practices I have ever encountered. Nevertheless, it has been the most rewarding. I’ve been to a different class EVERY day, and each day I’ve learned something new about myself. In last nights class, the thing I learned was after all the changes and “growth”, I am the same!
How am I the same if we as humans change yearly, monthly, and daily? I’ve learned an astonishing fact which is, “something” in us that NEVER changes. That “something” has been in us since we were children, teenagers, and now adults. It’s the “thing” that searches for the truth…truth being NEVER changing (follow me now it may be kinda deep here but I’m keep it light). We have to keep in mind that nothing around us is “truth” because everything changes and “truth” CAN NOT change. Words change, days change, movements change but that “something” that I spoke of a few sentences up, that “something” thats in us? That is truly, who we are. And in that..we are THE SAME!
So after some odd years on this earth…I’m still the same!
Everything that I’m now doing, at this present moment, has been embedded in me forever! The problem was I couldn’t see it because I’m a growth addict (as so many people are). I’m addict to doing better, getting more money, acquiring more things…EGO…everything that hinders me from living freely in the present moment. Everything that stops me from seeing that I am perfect the way I am! The way God made me! Realizing that yesterday was the most freeing experience EVER! It made me reflect on who I REALLY am inside. When no one’s around or looking. When the social media apps are closed. So many people LOVE to say “I’m unapologetically me”, but fail to ask themselves if they truly are. I’ve always been unapologetically me to others, but I haven’t been fair in being that to MYSELF. What I did was allowed my experiences with others to taint my perspective of myself.
I needed this realization to happen in the beginning of this journey, and at the time that it did! It allows me to walk into these next 3 weeks with an open mind and an open heart. Enjoying every step that I presently take and not worry about whats ahead….. Truly living for today!